What I'm Thankful For!

I am thankful for my family. My Dad and Stepmom who are always there no matter what I need. My Mother who always makes me laugh. My Sister, the only person who always knows what I am talking about. And everyone else in my family, my niece, my cousins, my aunts and uncles. :]

I am thankful for my friends. If I didn't have you, I would have nothing. I am thankful I don't have to spend all winter in Upstate New York weather. I am thankful for good books. I am thankful for good conversation. I am thankful for a roof over my head.

There are so many things in my life that I am thankful for. Far too many to list. And I am thankful for you taking the time to care what I have to say. :]

Living my life... finally.

So I have been a complete schmuck about writing lately. It's been an intense week. I finally moved out of the house I was living in, and it was just awkward the last week I was there. I felt like a prisoner. Every time I talked to them about when I was leaving they would just change the topic or come up with reasons to keep me there longer. It was a little insane. I finally got out last Friday. I almost had to call a hostage negotiator.

In other news, weight news, I have been the same weight for 9 days. At least I haven't gained anything, that's what matters to me! Anyway, just wanted to post a quick update. I have about 5 or 6 things I need to post in the next few days. So many funny things I saw while out and about in St Louis!

Shoe Of The Week!

Aldo Shoes style Pucket. 80 dollars.

I would buy a whole new wardrobe to go with these shoes. I saw them in the store and fell in love. They also come in a blue multi. These would be awesome to spice up your little black dresses come work holiday party season!

Skinny Bitch Update!

So, I get on the scale for the first time in two days, and I am thrilled I did. I am shedding all the water weight I was holding. This low carb diet is fabulous. They say for every pound of carbohydrates stored in your body, you are holding onto a gallon of water! That's 8 pounds of water weight! Up until last week all I ate was carbs. Now that I see how quick the weight can shed without them, I will definitely not be near them anymore!

All I can see when I close my eyes are visions of me in size 10 jeans, a cashmere sweater, and those awesome buckled boots from Charlotte Russe! I am so happy I finally broke my stupid weight! :)

Honey I just can't get around it anymore, you make me feel like home is where you are.

Song of the Day : Songs In My Pocket by Bethany Joy Lenz

You ever get a song stuck in your head? Not just a line or two of a song, but the whole thing is on repeat? And on top of that it's like there is a slide show of your life that goes along with the song playing in your mind. This song has been on repeat in my head for a solid week. And on top of that, it's basically the perfect song for my last week.

As I mentioned a few days ago, I was recently reunited with someone from a long time ago. I don't even have any words in my vernacular to tell you how I feel about this. But let's just say things in that department are going amazing.

I haven't stepped on the scale today. The last few days have been kind of a plateau and I am trying to break it, but honestly I am sick of seeing the same number on the scale. The weight I am at now I have not been under in almost two years. So hopefully once I break this I will be able to keep losing. I am eating so much better. And I am working out. Now I just need a small miracle. :)

And in other news my move date is slowly approaching. :) This girl is Georgia bound and cannot wait. I am a little mixed about it. I am definitely going to miss my sister. And I will actually be closer to my parents than I am here. I just cannot help being excited about it. For the next two weeks I will probably have long drawn out goodbyes and will be listening to some sappy music.

School Yard Shenanigans

Seriously, I would like to take a minute out of my day to just rant a little bit. Today's topic: grown adults who talk shit behind peoples backs.

At this point in my life I am 23 years old, and finally feel like an adult. And my whole life I was the type of person where I would never say something about you to my friends if I wouldn't say it to your face. My friends can attest to that. Just ask them how many fights I got into in high school.

Now, if you are 30 years old and you have a problem with me, bring it to me. Don't bitch and moan like a 12 year old girl. Chances are we will sit down and talk about whatever the problem is. But running your mouth about me and thinking I won't find out is a very childish maneuver. I feel like I am back in high school.

There is nothing you could say to me at this point in my life that will make me uneasy or upset. So seriously, if you have a problem, why don't you tell me? Why don't you act like the adult you are supposed to be, and not like a fucking high school freshman.

And the scale says:

Down another 3 pounds. They say all you have to do is change one thing about your eating habits and one thing about your exercise routine and you will start to see the pounds melt away. I am pretty sure I could make my goal in no time if this keeps up for a little while.

Yesterday I drank about 5 gallons of water. I had to pee a lot, but my appetite was seriously decreased and I couldn't be happier. I ate the healthiest I have in so long, not to mention I stayed away from carbs. I am going to ween myself off of carbs completely. I had a lot of success with a no carb diet when I was in high school. So here is to hoping.

This is me at 19. I have no full size pics, so I will have to put some partials up. But check that out. I had no stomach. It was awesome.

This is my actual stomach. I took this one day after tanning. Weirdly I was wearing the same shirt. Those khaki's I am wearing are size 10!

This is me about two months ago. Wearing size 18 pants. That's just unacceptable. Right now I am 15 pounds less than that. I am comfortably wearing 16s. I will be happy when I fit in aforementioned size 10 khakis!

My Christmas Wish List!

So it's that time of year again! Time to compile your Christmas Wish List! Well, with mine, I have a whole slew of books I want, but I would definitely settle for a Kindle E-Reader! <3 And of course clothes and shoes!! So here is my visual wardrobe wish list!

Charlotte Russe Crocodile Slingbacks in Brown.
29.99
4 3/4 inch heel




 

Alloy Crocodile Stiletto in Black
32.90
5 inch heel with hidden 1 inch front platform.

Alloy Jetset Rip & Repair Jeans
42.99

And if you look closely, the model is wearing the crocodile stilettos!

AE Sexy Scoop Cashmere Sweater in Bright Pink
79.50
And who doesn't love cashmere at Christmas?

AE Cable Knit Cardigan Jacket
49.50
Well, I will be living in Georgia come Christmas time. I don't need anything super warm for outerwear!

AE Active Pant in Washed Blue
29.50
I love cuddling up to a fire in sweats with a coffee and a copy of Wuthering Heights come Christmas morning.

AE Favorite Pant in Driftwood
39.50
Sexy, fun, casual and they make my bum look FAB!

Last but definitely not least!

AE Pleated Dress in Black
34.50

Every girl should have a little black dress in their wardrobe. I like to get a new one each year!





So, guys, tell me what you want. Share your visual wardrobe wish lists! Christmas is right around the corner!

Operation Skinny Bitch!

So, I have never been so motivated to lose weight in my life.

I have been overweight for a while. And I stayed that way just out of complacency. When I graduated high school, five and a half years ago, I was a size 10. I washappy, healthy, and seriously in love. Over the last few years, between bad breakups and huge holiday meals, I have gained some serious poundage. I am now a size 16/18. I look in the mirror and hate myself some days.

Well, now I am faced with an amazing opportunity. There is a guy from my past who has recently resurfaced. He was my best friend from 5th grade until 9th. He moved Christmas vacation freshman year, and I spoke to him for the first time in 9 years a few nights ago. To be perfectly honest, he was more than a best friend. I was his first crush (if you could see the smile on my face right now) and I know for a fact if he hadn’t left we would have dated all through High School. I actually had intentions of asking him to be my boyfriend the day we came back after vacation.

Ok, so let’s put out there that talking about this, and writing it, makes me feel like I am 14 again. Crap, I am 23 years old. An adult. And I still get butterflies. Eff.

Well, it’s been weighing on my mind, no pun intended, that his memories of me are my 14 year old self. I was a size 8, I was on crutches, I was awkward, and I had a fabulous complexion. Basically all the opposites of who I am now. I am a bit larger, lost the crutches, started having breakouts when I turned 21, and I am definitely not awkward anymore. I am very sociable.

So, yesterday starts my new life. By my 24th birthday, July 23rd, I will back into a size 12 if it kills me, although 10 is my goal. That’s 8 months from now, and there is no reason I can’t do it if I put my mind to it. If I can lose one size every other month than I can do this. I am going to write about it everyday, because if other people are reading this, then I know I can make myself stay with it. I am going to exercise. I am going to eat so much better. I am going to make it happen.

So I found out when I move to Georgia, I will only be 6 hours away from him. After all these years, he is going to be a mornings drive away. And the best part is we are making plans to see each other on December 18th. So, my goal is to lose one dress size in a month. I have the best pair of American Eagle jeans that are just one size to small for me. And they make my bum look amazing. So here's to hoping. :) Wish me luck.

These are a few of my favorite things..

So I don't know about any of you but I am addicted to Project Runway. Every Thursday you can find me sitting on my butt eating junk food and stressing over who is going home and who is fabulous.

Last nights final challenge episode was so disappointing to me. I knew who would make it, but I really didn't want it to come down to who it did. If I could have made it happen, I would have picked Carol Hannah, Irena and Christopher, not Althea. But that's how it goes.

In true PR fashion, now is the time of year to display some fabulous designs from last years winner, Christian Siriano. You remember him, right? He was totally fierce!

No matter which one of those girls win, I know that we will see some amazing looks come spring time! I am rooting for Carol Hannah. And even those who don't win can still go on to make a huge name for them self. Look at this seasons clear fan favorite, Christopher Straub. Here are some pieces available on his website!

I am such a huge fan of Mr. Straub. If I ever get married, I want him to make my dress. He is such a visionary, and I loved every single thing he made on Project Runway. I feel that everyone should own a Christopher Straub piece. If he ever starts making shoes I am going to be in serious trouble.

I love how guys think girls are insane!

Everyone knows that there are things guys do that are just impossible to decode. Certain behavior or actions that just make you want to shake him until he tells you what he was thinking. Over the last month or so I have had my share of cooky male behavior, and all I want is to know what is going through people minds when he is saying or doing it.

Here is a bit of a back story for you. This is about two of my exes. We will call then Dennis and Shawn.

I dated Shawn from August of 2006 until May of 2007. We lived together from September 12, 2006 until April 4th, 2007. Everything was pretty awesome. Well, until it wasn't. We had a disastrous break up. Words were thrown, possessions of mine were stolen and pawned, I informed his friends and family of all the awful, and illegal, things he was doing in the last month of our relationship. After May I didn't speak to him at all for over two years. Out of the blue, yesterday, he texts me and says "Well, I guess this is as good a time as any to apologize for the way I treated you." Wtf is that all about? It's been over two years. What does that mean? Because, really, I am at a complete loss.

Now let's talk about Dennis. We dated from October 2007 until April 2008. Is was actually a dull relationship. I mean, it was awesome, but it was comfortable from day one. We ended up getting bored and ended it due to mutual frustrations over nothing to do, ever. But we stayed friends. We hung out still. When I moved to Pennsylvania in July 2008, he would come visit me maybe once a month, and we would hang out, go out drinking or out to dinner. And then I moved to Illinois this past August. Well, he had a week vacation in October, and he decided to come spend it with me. So he got in his car and drove 16 straight hours to come see me. It was the nicest thing a guy has ever done for me. My parents and sisters keep trying to tell me he is still into me, but I don't see it. His behavior doesn't really show it at all. What the hell is up with this?

So, since Dennis I have been single. By choice. I have been out on a ton of dates. Mostly bad. And the only really awesome guy I have met, I met two weeks before I moved 1000 miles away. So that's my luck, right?

OMG Shoes!

Because really, what else were you expecting from me? :)

A trend that I am really starting to fall for is the tights over heels or skinny jeans over heels. As long as you have to body to pull this look off, I say go for it. It's so feminine and chic and I love it. It's a strong motivator in my weight loss goals. :)

In keeping up with this wonderful trend, I thought I would find some shoes that look absolutely awesome with long tights or skinny jeans.

Triple Strap Platform Sandals from Deb. $29.98. Available in Black, Red and Purple. 3.75" Heel.

Super comfortable and adorable. Will look amazing with tights or jeans, or anything really.

With the right outfit you can dress these shoes up or down.

Snakeskin Texture Gladiator Sandals from Deb. $29.99. Available in Black. 4.25" Heel.

I absolutely adore these shoes. They could work with anything, although I think I would rock them with a black boyfriend blazer and destroyed skinny jeans.

Studded Gladiator Platform from Charlotte Russe. $34.99. 5" Chunky Heel.

These shoes get two thumbs up. Not only do they have the best straps ever, they also sport the chunky heel, which makes them insanely more comfortable. Me being five foot three inches, I could definitely use a lift every now and then, so almost all of my heels are at least 4 inches, and a few are 5. I plan on purchasing these as soon as possible.

 

Buckled Strap Platforms from Charlotte Russe. $29.99. 5" Heel.

These are very similar to the first pair from Deb. Charlotte Russe's take on these shoes, though, made the straps thicker, and the heel higher. And I love 'em.

I can't wait to see what the take on this trend in Atlanta is. Pictures to come.

Are you there God? It's me, Carolyn.

So, I am THRILLED with a capital TH to announce I have an internship in Georgia lined up. Working for a wedding planner. As of now it's one day a month, but I am probably going to be able to sweet talk my way into one day a week and every event. The experience I can get from this will be awesome.


That way I stand a chance of finding a job when I decide to finally move to NYC.

Sticks and stones may break some bones, but words are my weapon of choice!

So, it's recently been brought to my attention that I am a very judgmental person. Well, I guess I have to agree. But I don't think I am judgmental in a horrible way. I am very honest. And I bring extra attention to the obvious. I may talk about people with muffin top, but that doesn't mean I have anything really against them. I just don't want to see it, and I don't think anyone else does either. But in the spirit of being judgmental, I want to take this opportunity to talk about some things that really bother me!

Mullets! Really. REALLY. I don't feel like a whole lot of words are necessary here. But I mean, come on. Don't you know you look ridiculous? Don't you know you look like Billy Ray Cyrus circa 1994? Not cool. Not attractive. Not even easily managed.

Don't fall asleep near me. I will cut your hair in your sleep.

Super Long Nails Who goes to the salon for a full set and just says "keep the tips full length"? And why? What can you do with these nails? I can list things you can't do. Text message. Type. Wash dishes. Zip or button clothing. Tie your shoes. Run your hands through your hair without making yourself bleed. Hold your boyfriends hand. Use a loofah. I could really go on for days. I just don't get why anyone would want these nails. Unless you get paid to inflict pain on people.

Multi Colored Hair Please. Don't get me wrong. I am a fan of the scene. I am very much into body mods, I myself have 6 piercings not counting my ears. But seriously, this hair will get you fired from even McDonalds. It's definitely acceptable if you plan to be rainbow bright for Halloween. But otherwise, just stick to something natural.






Tune in later in the week for more fun-tastic rants about socially unacceptable behavior and appearances. <3

Shoe Of The Week!

Every girl needs a good pair of flats. Whether you are walking to the office or going out to grab a coffee or even just checking your mailbox, you cannot go wrong with a pair of simple black flats. Especially not when they are Vera Wang.


Simply Vera: Vera Wang Pitta Flats 42.99 available at Kohls!

• Crinkled faux-patent-leather upper provides sleek appeal.
• Rhinestone accents sparkle with style.
• Ruffled trim adds feminine charm.
• Padded footbed cushions every step.
• Flexible outsole models your foot's movements.
• Details:
  • Faux-patent-leather upper
  • Rubber outsole

She comes from Georgia where the peaches grow.

So I am pleased to say that I will be leaving small town life. No more town of 750. No more corn fields. No more small town people and their small town minds! I am moving to Georgia in less than a month, and I can't wait! I will be about an hour outside of Atlanta. I'm pretty stoked.

Now, a topic I have been dying to address :

Muffin Top. Seriously. No words are necessary. But I have a few. This is not ok. Not attractive. Not appealing in any way shape or form. It's skanky. Trashy. Wear longer shirts or higher waistbands.

Now, I am not exactly skinny. Not even close. But all of my shirts cover my "gut". If you have a belly, please do not wear skin tight clothing. At all. Not ever.

Muffin top is a St Louis area epidemic. And it needs to end. I am going to do my part and go do some crunches. :)